"Today I started loving you again I'm right back where I've really always been I got over you just long enough to let my heartache mend And then today I started loving you again " ----- Merle Haggard Yes, today I started loving you again. While I rest my head on your lap, I cant stop the flooding of the good old memories. Those moments in my life when I hated you , but was forced to keep our association intact.
Let me be very frank here, I was never a great admirer of you. I still remember how much I hated to be with you. I dont want to blame it on the college which brought us together. I mean, if I had studied better and good good rank in entrance exam , I could have got into Trivandrum Engg college. Fortunately or unfortunately, I got admission in UCE . I was left with no other option , but to accept you in my life. And some where during the final years, I started liking you. We travelled a lot with each other and slowly I kinda loved you.
When college got over , we got seperated. To be painfully honest, I was very happy. Even when I liked you in college, deep inside I felt suffocated. The arrogant me always wanted better things in life.
Then I got a job. I got money. I bought a bike and then a car. I started moving around in style & comfort, completely ignoring you. I see you here and there , but I always pretended that I did not see you. And then we had few confrontations on the road. The other day, I breaked my car right infront of you and pretended as if I did not hear you. I know , I treated you with utter disrespect everytime we met.
I also made sure that I took around my female friends in the car, while you looked at us from the sides. Did I get sadistic pleasure out of it ? I dont know . To be honest, I was over confident that I would never have to be associated with you again.
And today , it all changed. It was 3 am in the morning and when I got out of Cherthala Railway station. While I walked a few kilometers in the dark on that deserted highway, I was feeling lonely. I have a job , I have money , I have a car and a bike ...but here I'm walking alone on a deserted highway in the dark. No vehicle to take me home, no friends to give me company. The clouds were threatening to drench me by occassional drizzles and I was all alone on that deserted highway.
And then you came from nowhere. When I showed my hands to catch your attention, I was not sure if you would ever give me a lift . But you stopped. You were the only one who stopped to pick me up. You let me sleep on your lap while you continued your journey to Trivandrum. Oh my dear , today I started loving you again.
I may not have looked back at you , when we reached Trivandrum bus stand. I may not have said a bye or thanks to you ,when I walked away. But I want you to know something. I want you to know that, I'll treat you with respect next time I see you. I want you to know that, I appreciate you stopping to pick me up today. I thank you for letting me sleep on your soft seat through the lonely night. I want you to know that ,today I started loving you again. Oh ..my dear KSRTC.
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