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This January end was ours .. Sai-Kazhaks 97 batch's !!!
We had two of our school mates , Akhilesh and Hari getting married . As there was 2 days in between the functions , 7 of us decided to hang out somewhere away from the crowd.
Indran decided on the place to stay, "Desadan", the highest resort in Kerala. Reaching there was tedious, coz we just had a Scorpio and 8 people crammed inside it. Once we got inside the cottage , we agreed with Indran , that it was worth the effort. Such a beautiful view of Munnar , right from the top.
Amongst us, we were 2 Doctors , 2 Engineers , 2 Managers and a FilmStar. Pretty good mix and match , right ? However, we didnt meet to discuss about our professions . Though, once in a while discussions slipped towards Dr Vipin's colleagues and ex-colleagues , we were pretty focussed on the topic . Topic as always was, Marriage ( less ) and Gals ( more ) .
Thats when Anish Mathew , (I'd referred to him here ) disclosed his heart-wrenching story . Btw, Anish recently joined Lehman Brothers, Mumbai and is doing some management. He flies to UK once in a while for a short stint . After trying hard ( & desperately ) to get a gal by himself, Anish had accepted the defeat. He started showing great love towards parents and homeland and in between their casual talks ,sneaked in his desire to get married.
Parents put up an ad in Kerala Matrimonial and Malayala Manorama Classifieds. Enquiries started flooding in and Anish wanted to be there . For him , atleast knowing how much lakhs he is worth , would be a much required ego booster.
Though for first couple of days , nothing worth while came in , an interesting call came one evening. Following is what was conversed , and what could have been going through the minds of characters involved.
Characters :
- CB Fila: Could-be father in law for Anish ( Only voice is heard )
- Dad : Anish's dad ( An elderly x-tian figure )
- Anish : The ill-fated himself ( A hunk , in his late 20s)
Scene : Evening in a typical christian home near Athaani. Anish sipping his cup of tea , and dad reading malayala manorama for the second time .
Phone rings .... Trrringgg Trrrringggg....
An excited Anish looks up (hmm, could it be some fish that got into the net) . Dad , slowly folds the paper and walks to the phone in slow motion
Dad : Hellooo
CB Fila : Helloo , isn't this 2758684 ?
Dad : Yes
CB Fila : I'm calling with reference to your matrimonial ad.
Dad : Ah yes , Its for my second son .
CB Fila : ooh , I'm looking for a guy for my only daughter.
Dad : aah , Yes .
Few seconds passes , as both party does not know how to proceed with conversation .. And then CB Fila breaks the ice .
CB Fila : Are you people rich ???
Dad , caught off-gaurd by such a blunt questions , coughs twice before replying
Dad : We are doing good .
CB Fila : oooh (not quiet satisfied by the answer ). Fact is ....we are Rich, in every sense.
Few seconds of uneasy silence
CB Fila : Forget that , Is your son educated enough ?
Dad : Yeaaah , He took BTech in Chemical Engineering from Thrissur .
CB Fila : ( as if, he never heard of such a branch before ) Chemical-aaa ????
Dad : ( easily sensing that CB Fila is not impressed , plays the next card ) .. And then he took management degree from Banglore .
CB Fila : Banglore !!..... Which college ?
Dad : (with a bit of excitement and pride) From IIM , Banglore
CB Fila : (soo casually ) Why ??? Didnt he get anywhere in Kerala . ??
That caught Dad off-gaurd again . Recomposing himself after a deep breath ...
Dad : No , Actually IIM is a good college.
CB Fila : Ohh.... (with a lot of sarcasm ..) So your son got a payment seat, in that College eh ?
Dad : Noo.. He had half scholarship when he joined the college.
CB Fila : Oooooohh.... (with even more sarcasm , as if Anish's dad never had money to pay fees)
CB Fila is terribly unimpressed. Dad started perspiring and Anish is confused from the expressions of his Dad. Anish should be , coz for past many years he had only seen his dad saying proudly that his Son did his Btech from Thrissur Govt Engineering College and then went on to get MBA from IIM banglore after an excellent CAT score. And here , he sees his dad sweating , while talking about it.
CB Fila : What is your son doing ?
Dad : (trying to recollect Anish's company name) He was a manager in the previous company .
CB Fila : What is he doing now ?
Dad : (trying desperately to figure out what anish's current post is ) ...hmm one sec , lemme ask him. (turns to Anish) What is your current designation ?
Anish pretending as if he was least interested in entire conversation, says "Business Analyst".
Dad : ( to the phone ) My son is a Business Analyst , in Mumbai .
CB Fila : What is he ? ( as if he never heard it first time )
Dad : Business Analyst ( This time Dad got it right with proper stress)
CB Fila : Ohho ...(taking a deep breathe and clearing the throat) My daughter is a SOFTWARE ENGINEER (yes , with a stress) , and that too in TECHNOPARK (This was even more louder stress), Trivandrum
Dad : (To avoid hurting CB Fila's ego ) ..wow , thats nice.
CB Fila : Where is your Son working ?
Dad : Mumbai , in an American Corporate Bank
CB Fila : Bank-aaa ??? (in absolute disbelief ) .
Dad still cant get the "Lehman Brothers" to his tounge. That not only hurt Anish , it pushed his ego under the floor mat. Anish couldnt take anymore beating on his ego , so he walked up and took the phone from Dad's hand which was already trembling and sweating.
Anish : Hello, I'm Anish . Its for me , dad put the ad in matrimonial.
CB Fila : oh , you are working in a Bank ? ( he is still wondering how he can marry her only daughter off to a bank employee ).
Anish : Yeah , its a corporate Bank , Lehman Brothers .
CB Fila : What Brothers ?? (He had only heard about Jos Brothers and Alukkas .. till now )
Anish : LEHMAN BROTHERS ( Anish made it a point to convey his irritation on asking twice )
CB Fila : mmm.... ( as if he could think ) ... Does your bank give you a 2 wheeler to move around ? I mean , BIKE . !!!!
THHAAD . .........CRASH...............!!!!!!!! The telephone broke into few pieces as it hit the wall. Anish packed his bag straight away and came with us to Munnar . !!!! His ego bruised and trashed like never before.
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